My Top 25 In Sept. 2011

Sometimes I surprise even myself. (Well, the Johari Window does have a pane for that.)

This afternoon I casually glanced at my iTunes’ “Top 25 Most Played” and I was surprised at the top 10 results:
 

Ever since I acquired this particular laptop (and started playing music using its iTunes) early this year, I’ve played J-Lo’s “On The Floor” the most number of times?! Jeez, I liked that tune, but not that much. And here is where the flaw of that listing lies; I remember one day I left my desk with my iTunes playing “On The Floor” on a loop. I attended what I thought was going to be a short meeting; instead, it turned into a mega-meeting that lasted for hours. And after that I was dragged into another meeting. So when I returned to my desk it was already very dark outside, and J-Lo was still “On The Floor” dancing the night away.

Nicki was also a surprise, though I’m sure I listened to her 104 times. A surprise because it didn’t feel like 104 times. Her “boom, badoom, boom” boomed so smoothly, it was a delight to listen to again and again.

Solo female acts dominate my top 25. Of my top ten, 8 are occupied by them (some with featured guest stars). Of all the female solo acts, Robyn has the most number of songs in my top 25, with 5 of her songs from her excellent Body Talk album in my list. The only other act to have more than one song in my top 25 is Rihanna, with two of her hits making the list.

Only two bands entered my top 10, one from the 80s (Tears For Fears) and one from 2011 (Foster The People). There are three other multiple-member acts in my top 25: Fleetwood Mac (at #14 with “Storms”), Maroon 5 (at #22 with “Moves Like Jagger”) and the power-bonded mega-boy band NKOTBSB (at #23 with “Don’t Turn Out The Lights”).

And I only have two male solo acts in my top 25, Enrique Iglesias (at #12 with “Escape”) and Brandon Flowers (at #21 with “Crossfire”).

Most of the songs I listened to are fairly current hits. The oldest song is Fleetwood Mac’s “Storms,” which was released in 1979. The next oldest is Tears For Fears’ “Suffer The Children” which was in their 1983 album The Hurting. Madonna’s “Thief Of Hearts” in 1992 rounds up the pre-2000 songs.

So how does your top 25 list look?

Play Ball

Sex is like playing tennis.

You need a partner to play tennis. You play with balls. You get all sweaty and worked out. And in the end you either enjoyed it or you’re disappointed by your performance.

One can choose to put meaning to sex or not. And when you do (or not), it changes the complexion of the sex act. Just like in tennis. Maybe you’re training to be the next Rafael Nadal, and you treat every game as an important training session; if you sucked at a game, you’d be very disappointed. But if you’re just playing for fun with friends, then win or lose it wouldn’t matter so much, so long as you had fun.

You might call out “Love!” more than once during tennis, but if you keep your head on, you know better than to take it seriously. Unless you are taking the game very seriously, in which case every call out will mean more.

Yes, sex with feelings/meaning/love feels wonderful, but so is playful, recreational sex between two consenting and aware adults. Besides, it’s apples and oranges; not everyone will attach the same intensity and the same meaning to sex.

So when people say, “I’d rather have sex with meaning or not have sex at all,” I want to ask them, “Have you ever played a friendly game of tennis?”

The Sex Workers Fabcast, Part Two

And now, here is part two! Here you'll hear more.

[1] Find out more about Victor (he with the very soft voice).
[2] Know Kenneth aka Boy Shiatsu's story, his values and his world view.
[3] Both of them open up about having relationships given their line of work.
[4] Discover if sex workers do get to have relationships (sexual or romantic) with other sex workers.
[5] And listen to Victor talk about a downside to that line of work--the exposure to drugs.

In this part we also go back to our previous Fabcast wherein we discussed Boy Shiatsu's question, "Will you have a relationship with a sex worker?" Back then Migs was very insistent that he will not consider a relationship with a sex worker.

And Migs drops a bomb regarding a previous client of Boy Shiatsu.

Intrigued? Then click and listen! (Again, please forgive how at times the voices are so soft. This Fabcast is best heard using headphones or earphones.)

Download this fabcast (right click and save)

Music credits:
"Sexy And I Know It" by LMFAO
"Heto Na Naman" by the San Miguel Master Chorale and Philharmonic Orchestra
"Would You...?" by Touch & Go
"Miss Clare Remembers" by Enya
"The Drugs Don't Work" by The Verve

La Drag Diva!

So there is life after podcasting, hahaha!

After The Dan & Rye Show ended, Rye went the RuPaul route, donned wigs, falsies and dresses, and transformed into La Chiquitta. Now Hong Kong’s number one drag diva has a single and a video out! Check out “Tranny In The House!” (I so looove the beat.)

Cosmo Goes Cosmic

“Ang imba ng mga Scorpio!” D exclaimed out of the blue.

“What?” I glanced at him before turing my attention back to the road in front of me. He was leafing through a copy of the Cosmo 69 Bachelors.

“There’s a lot of water signs in this year’s bachelors list,” he said after a while. “I guess there really must be something about water signs.”

D and I share a skeptical interest in astrological signs. When I was younger I really took to it, thinking that perhaps the planetary pull have an effect on us at the time we were born. Of course as I read more and more about astrology, the more I became skeptical towards it. Sure, it’s not as simple as knowing your sun, or primary, sign. Take a sign, say Leo, then start going through all the Leos you know. You’d see how the description falls short for most of the Leos you know. So now it’s just something that is interesting to know but too incredulous to totally believe in.

Still, it makes for an interesting conversation.

“Really?” I asked. “What are the water signs again?”

“Cancer, Scorpio, and Pisces,” D replied.

“Sige nga. Let’s count the number of water signs,” I said. “Or better yet, let’s tally all the signs of this year’s Cosmo bachelors batch.”

So we stopped over at a fastfood place, and on an Excel spreadsheet we tallied the sun signs of the 69 cosmo bachelors (we excluded the centerfolds), and the following below are the results.

* * * * *

The Top Signs In The 2011 Cosmo Bachelors’ List:

Scorpio (10)
Libra (8)
Aries (7)
Taurus (6)
Virgo (6)
Sagittarius (6)
Cancer (5)
Leo (5)
Capricorn (5)
Gemini (4)
Pisces (4)
Aquarius (3)

Top Elements In The 2011 Cosmo Bachelors’ List:

Water signs (total = 19)
Cancer (5)
Scorpio (10)
Pisces (4)

Fire signs (total = 18)
Aries (7)
Leo (5)
Sagittarius (6)

Earth signs (total = 17)
Taurus (6)
Virgo (6)
Capricorn (5)

Air signs (total = 15)
Gemini (4)
Libra (8)
Aquarius (3)

* * * * *

“It’s interesting that Libra only came in second,” I said. “Libra is known as the sign of handsome guys and beautiful girls.”

“But Scorpios have that sensual something,” D said. “Also, they are often focused on themselves, so maybe that’s why there are more Scorpio bachelors.”

“Or they just don’t mind being called a bachelor,” I added. “It seems sad that there are only four Pisceans.” D and I are both March-born.

“Maybe because Pisces don’t stay bachelors for long,” D laughed. I smiled back, and decided not to point out my 44-year wait in Singlehoodville.

The Sexworkers Fabcast, Part 1

(The following Fabcast was recorded the weekend before AJ passed away.)

Sex workers. For many of us, we look down on guys who get paid for sex. Why do sex work when one can earn money in a decent job? 

Remember the Fabcast when we recorded phone-in questions? Boy Shiatsu was first introduced there, and it was his question that sparked a spirited discussion amongst us. Well, 25-yr old Kenneth, aka Boy Shiatsu, is back for this Fabcast.

And this time he’s joined by Victor, a 21-year old from Olongapo who was introduced to the sex trade when he came to Manila.

A former sex worker and a current one; what stories will they tell? Listen.

(Oh, and sorry but you really have to listen in close, because Victor is so soft-spoken. I have tried all that is electronically possible with the available software I have to boost his voice, but it could only go so far. So this Fabcast is best heard using earphones or headphones.)

Download this fabcast (right click and save)

Music credits:
“Left To My Own Devices” by the Pet Shop Boys
“The Sodom And Gomorrah Show” by the Pet Shop Boys
“Suffer The Children” by Tears For Fears

What If?

Scenario: You find out that this person is HIV positive. Also, you find out that this person is bent on infecting others; he feels his life has already ended, so might as well drag others down with him in the process. You’ve tried to reason with him, but he refuses to listen to reason.

What would you do? What can you do?

I asked those questions because it is not the first time that I’ve heard of stories, whispered mostly, of HIV-positive people who willfully do not disclose their status and engage in unsafe sex with different partners. Why they do it, one can only guess. Some say it’s a form of revenge. Others posit that they are on a self-destruct mission and are bent on bringing people down with them. Whatever their reasons are, the only thing you’re sure of is that they are committed to spreading the virus via unprotected sex.

I know that it is against the law to disclose someone else’s HIV-positive status without that person’s consent. So if you report him to the police, can you be sued even if your intention is to stop them from spreading the virus?

And then there’s the question of the “victims” of this guy. If they agreed to engage in unsafe sex, aren’t they also partially responsible for not protecting themselves? Even if they were told an outright lie (“I’m safe, I’m HIV-negative”), they should know better than to just accept at face-value a claim made by someone whom they’ve met for the first time.

So, what would you do? What can you do?