Watch Me Entertain Myself!

Sacha Guitry once said, "You can pretend to be serious, but you can't pretend to be witty." Oh yes, I'm the great pretender.
(pilot episode: 20 January 2004)

Monday, November 17, 2008

Hair Cut

Recently I was told that, given my numerous stories of sexual encounters here in The McVie Show, some readers think that I am any of the following: [1] lucky with sex; [2] skilled at snaring guys for sex; or [3] drop-dead gorgeous and fucklicious.

Let’s get number three out of the way first. My photo is present here in The McVie Show, and I’ve also posted other photos of me here. Brad Pitt will definitely not feel threatened at all by me. Heck, not even Brod. Pete will be perturbed. In the Male Physical Beauty Bell Curve, I am lost somewhere in the mass middle. So to those who think that “ang haba-haba ng hair ni McVie!”, I say to thee: Kulot po buhok ko; at maraming puting buhok na.

As for number one, I can count the number of times I got to hook up with an Adonis-like hunk: a grand total of zero, ziltch, zip. I must say that I do get “lucky” in a sense that I get to have some action in places or at times when it seems least expected. But I do not consider that as all-luck. Rather, it’s a combination of luck and that quality mentioned in number two: skill. It’s skill that’s honed by experience (yes, I admit I’m old). It’s really more about reading signs and seizing opportunities rather than forcing events and people to conform to what you want. Remember, the universe will not bend to your will, “The Secret” be damned. Rather, you ride with the waves of the Fates, and always be on the sharp lookout—a glance held a second too long, a double-take, a towel slung dangerously low, a lifting of an eyebrow.

And most important of all is this: For every one successful sex story in The McVie Show, there are four (or more) unsuccessful attempts that go unmentioned. Of course I don’t write about them; there’s nothing to write about! (And there’s nothing funny about rejection. Well, maybe there is, and one day I’ll be mature enough to not only laugh about it but also blog about it.) It’s knowing what to cut.

So, don’t think I’m a larger-than-life sex machine when I tell you that I hooked up with a hot daddy yesterday afternoon at the bathhouse, and that he silently closed his eyes and moaned in quiet ecstasy while I slowly pushed my cock into his willing ass. Because before that, there was this sizzling hot young Chinoy stud (possibly in his early 20s), all lean yet ripped, with the smoothest, lick-able skin, wearing a red cap that slyly covered his eyes—I saw him look at me and ignore me and, in quick succession, hooked and dragged into his room (which was right beside mine) three of the hottest men in the crowd at that time. And I could hear every creak and squeak, every moan and groan bouncing off the walls and ceiling and torturing me as I listened from behind a thin wooden wall. And much later, when he actually stood beside me along the corridor, and I looked straight into his eyes and moved inches closer to him and then reached out and caressed his right nipple, he just looked bored at my hand, turned and walked away.

Last I checked my hair is close-cropped, not long and flowing.


MkSurf8 said...

at one point, we either reject or get rejected.

so on to the next ;-)

thanks for the link. ;-)

dalumat said...

sometimes i think i blog about the fun sex in my life just to make myself feel good and forget about the rejections, hehe. i could post this entry as my own for my readers who make so much fuss about the sex. except for the photo part. i never show myself. :-)

~Carrie~ said...

I like this entry. I can so relate to this because I've had a string of rejection in the bathhouse. It's painful, but maybe someday when you're mature enough to laugh about it, maybe you could blog them. Lemme just mention how I found a guy I like or a guy approaches me. When you're just about to make contact, someone else hot snatches your catch? I ended up ignoring both of them when they were double-taking at me after they had their fun. I was Bittter Ocampo that day, lol.

But at the end of the day, you'd tell yourself, "maganda ka pa rin".

joelmcvie said...

@DALUMAT: Because if you put a photo, men will be falling all over themselves trying to hook up with you! Pam-blockbuster yang beauty mo, hindi pang-indie. Hehehe.

@CARRIE: Hay naku, I always do the Bitter Ocampo route, but even then HINDI pa rin sila nagdo-double take sa akin, hahaha! Ang mantra ko na lang during those times is: "Cut my losses early, and cut clean."

Anonymous said...

"It’s really more about reading signs and seizing opportunities rather than forcing events and people to conform to what you want."

-- McVie, magkano magpahula sayo? Lol. :)

Talking about skill, it's your skill in writing sex stories that really makes us drool. Hehe. ;)

marco said...

all of us have that win-win pleasure adventures and rejections. be thankful of those win-wins you have had charge to experience and learn from your rejections. nice post mcvie =)