I found especially interesting the following questions asked in my formspring.me: “What's your take on a lasting monogamous gay relationship? Same success rate as the straight ones? Non-existent? I’m becoming cynical.”
It's not impossible, but I believe the odds are stacked against it—for now.
With straights, you have centuries of societies with cultures espousing monogamy. Laws made by both by societies and religions paint monogamy as the ideal. If the law won't make you behave, then shame from your neighbors will.
Some believe that monogamy and the family unit are there for economic and practical reasons. Economic because wealth is passed on from generation to generation and is kept within the family, and practical because the family unit increases the chances of their progeny to survive until they are old enough to fend for themselves.
But despite that, it's interesting to note that many hetero husbands still philander. They say the male species is built to be polygamous, so as to ensure that their genes have more chances of surviving and being passed on. And gay men are still men after all.
If there are gay couples that succeed in staying monogamous, it's because both partners bought the straight way of thinking—hook, line and sinker. But are the reasons for a straight and monogamous way of life also applicable to gay relationships? Let us examine.
Progeny—there are none. Even if a gay couple adapts a child, there is no passing-of-the-gene going on here. Economics—only the two will benefit in the sharing of wealth. So why stay monogamous? Just so we can mimic what was just taught to us?
Having said that: while I have never had a relationship ever, I realize that there have been two instances wherein I was exclusively dating someone. With the first guy, things just fell into place. With the second guy, he requested that we be exclusively dating, and I agreed without thinking of the consequences. In both cases, I was able to be “exclusive” for at least three months. Am I capable of being faithful for a long time? I’ll never really know until I have the opportunity.
The next question is: Do I want to?
7 comments:
magulat ka kung mabuntis ang mga binabae! hahaha. pwes, nafulfill na rin sa wakas ang kanilang instinct na magpasa ng genes! imagine how many good looking people there are if gay men could get preggy...lol
Define "lasting."
i blame it on our lack of social milestones. marriage, kids, etc. with nothing keeping us together, we cam't ever expect to be like straight people. idk just my 2 cents. :D
I only have one qestion to ask, do we have to?
@RUDEBOY: I assumed that the inquirer meant "to last a long time, perhaps until til-death-do-us-part" when he used the word "lasting". I'm pretty sure he didn't mean "forever" naman.
@CITYBUOY: "we cam't(sic) ever expect to be like straight people" <-- The question is, do we have to be like straight people?
@DAREDEVILRY: Mismo.
If we want to, then we can. If we have to, then we must.
Read this :D
Maybe being monogamous isn't the right way to go after all. :D
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/01/29/us/29sfmetro.html
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