Watch Me Entertain Myself!

Sacha Guitry once said, "You can pretend to be serious, but you can't pretend to be witty." Oh yes, I'm the great pretender.
(pilot episode: 20 January 2004)

Thursday, January 17, 2008

The Line

I placed my arm over his chest and snuggled closer. He looked up at the ceiling and asked: “So do you have a boyfriend?”

Ah, the perennial question. “Nope,” my perennial answer.

He waited a beat, and then, “But I bet there’s lots of guys waiting in line, hehehe.”

Ugh. When I heard that I just knew, just knew what he was hinting at. I’m not being presumptuous. It is years of hearing that particular plaintive pitch in their voices, that neediness creeping in between their words, the unspoken question: “May I get in line too?”

I crushed down the first thought that entered my mind: Just you try. Nope, he’s not ugly. In fact he’s kinda cute if you’re into moreno men and if you squint really hard. Several times. His body is neither thin nor fat, with muscles half-toned the natural way instead of bench-pressed to perfection. This guy looks like he can’t carry stuff heavier than his body weight.

But really, it was that note of neediness in that one line that made me leery. If this had happened a couple of years ago, I’d be overwhelmed with an urgent need to toss him out with a curt, “I have to shower already.” But I’ve mellowed. I turned to him and sweetly asked, “Wanna shower already?”

“Later, please? Let’s just rest after all that…” and he let his voice trail off.

Okay fine, why not? I said to myself. I’m in no hurry anyway. And as I snuggled my head on his chest, I caught a sharp whiff of his deodorant mixed with sweet manly sweat as my right hand traced that sexy trail of hair creeping from his belly button all the way down to his crotch. Yeah, I really am in no hurry at all.


cant_u_read said...

i can totally relate.

alam mo, in the not-so-distant past, i've always been the "needy" party. ngayon na ako na ung "don't-fucking-cling-on-me-you-moron" type, ngayon ko lang nare-realize na kadiri pala ako dati. kung makaka-ONS ko ang younger self ko, sisipain ko agad sya palabas ng kwarto pag nagkaputukan na.

joelmcvie said...

@RYE: Yeah, before I was also very violent in my dislike of that neediness--parang ang sarap nila sipain palabas ng kuwarto. But since I'm older and more mellow now, I'm rarely overwhelmed by a huge wave of disdain; usually I just shrug off their comment while mentally crossing them off my list.