Tweet For Tat

I had this straight friend from school. He and I lost touch after we graduated. Recently he found me on Twitter and started following my Tweets.

For those of you who are ignorant of Twitter, one does not need to be invited to be able to follow someone’s Tweets (meaning, he gets to read each and every Tweet message you post online). Once someone decides to follow you, you get an email notification that so-and-so is following you on Twitter.

When I received the notification that he was following me, I didn’t bother to return the favor. Until he messaged me that he was “felt bad” that I wasn’t following his Tweets. Of course, he was just kidding about being hurt—the usual lambingan of friends. Hmmm-kay, so I followed him.

Until recently, when I posted some sexually specific Tweets online. After that he Tweeted me directly, saying that he was getting too much information, and that he will “unfollow” me. At first I was fine with that. But then after that he sent a general Tweet announcing his “unfollowing” me and why. To be fair he didn’t identify who he was “unfollowing”.

That got me miffed. First of all, I didn’t point a gun to his head and demanded, “Read my Tweets, you twat!” Second, friends take you for who you are, the good and the bad, the similarities and the differences. The intervening years really drove us further apart, and I guess he just needed to know that I enjoy blow jobs in the morning for him to realize we’ve grown way, way apart.

But I suspected that all along, which was why I never bothered to follow him in the first place. I knew that his Tweets about his boringly straight, domestic problems and his geeky concerns were irrelevant to me. Whenever I read them, I just mentally filed them under “Background Info”.

But that was that.

And so without fanfare I “unfollowed” him in Twitter and deleted him in my other social network sites. Let’s call a spade a spade; once we were interested in each other’s lives. But we’ve moved on.

And that is that.