Watch Me Entertain Myself!

Sacha Guitry once said, "You can pretend to be serious, but you can't pretend to be witty." Oh yes, I'm the great pretender.
(pilot episode: 20 January 2004)

Monday, May 10, 2010

Election Selection

I therefore declare that in our precinct in Marikina, walang guwapo. How sad. Maybe I should transfer to Makati for the next elections. Or, like, Ayala Alabang noh. Yah.

* * * * *

In past elections we’d be at the school grounds at around 7:30am, go straight to our classroom/precinct, confirm our names on the voters’ list, and then cast our votes. The whole process would take no more than 15 to 20 minutes, since most people in our precincts chose to vote sometime after lunch.

When we got there at 7:40am, we were shocked at the long lines snaking outside the classrooms. I guess most people decided to be early in anticipation of the new system of voting using the PCOS machines. But the lines were orderly and the people in good spirits, so we took our place obediently and hunkered down for a long wait.

* * * * *

Don’t you just hate people on line who are forever talking, often in a very loud voice, to their companions or to anyone who approaches them? It’s as if they’re afraid that they will drop dead if they stopped talking.

The woman behind me kept repeating her story of how her dead father was still in the list of registered voters. She also would inform any and everyone within earshot of how this is the second election wherein she cannot exercise her right to vote because her name was not on the list of registered voters.

By the third time she repeated her “My name’s not on the list!” story, I had to restrain myself from turning around and snapping, “Eh wala ka namang ginawa, gaga! You’ve been a very bad girl! A very, very, bad, bad girl, gaga!”

* * * * *

One major cause of delay in our precinct was the number of senior citizens who came out to vote. Sure, it is their right to vote. But can’t they hurry things up?! The volunteers set up a second line for senior citizens only, and for every 5 voters going into the precinct they’d allow one senior citizen to come in.

I suggest that next elections they should just devote one precinct solely for senior citizens. Then when they finish casting their votes, the whole classroom will be locked down, with the doors and windows closed airtight. Then we gas them. We get their votes counted, but we get rid of them in the next elections.

It’s the Hitler Solution.

* * * * *

It took me around 6-8 minutes to actually vote. It’s a lot faster compared to writing down names. Shading was also very easy and fast—just start from the center of the oval and shade in an outwardly circular manner. It’s really the very long waiting time that they should address in the elections.

Now we wait for the bigger circus: the election results and the complaints by the losing candidates.

6 comments:

~Carrie~ said...

LOL @ Hitler solution. Harshness! :))

Felipe said...

oh yuh. you make lipat na in Alabang so in the next elections, we'll go to zobel together to vote. It's gona be so saya. Yuh!

Felipe said...

haylav d glassez btw.

Ming Meows said...

joel mabuti pa dito sa may uwan-uwan. it's raining money here.

iurico said...

hahaha - Hitler Solution.

I'm laughing my head off as Im reading this.

blueyellowred said...

re: walang pogi sa presinto: I hear you loud and clear! Walang eye candy and I was waiting for 3 and a half hours.