Watch Me Entertain Myself!

Sacha Guitry once said, "You can pretend to be serious, but you can't pretend to be witty." Oh yes, I'm the great pretender.
(pilot episode: 20 January 2004)

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Ring Christmas Balls!

After I deposited my phone, wallet and keys I went upstairs. On the first landing was an attendant in charge of frisking all those who entered. “Welcome to Fahrenheit, sir!” he practically yelled at me his greeting. Sigawan ba ako?! I screamed back at him, only in my head of course. He must be either high on drugs or really bored. Upstairs at the bar area I was greeted by pounding dance music; it was still too early for someone to be massacring some Mariah Carey song on videoke.

When I went downstairs to enter the wet area, I was greeted not by the usual house music but by… gasp! Deck the halls? Christmas tunes?! Yah-huh, fa-lala-lala! But to maintain the atmosphere of F they played only dance versions of Christmas songs. Still, it was strange to hear words like “our savior Jesus Christ” and “Prince of Peace” in such carnal settings. But then again, it got me thinking: why is it that we dichotomize the spiritual and the carnal? What if there was a way to merge the two? After all, in F can you find a lot of men kneeling before the altar of the Cock. “Body of Christ” or “John” or “Ernie” or whatever name your companion-for-the-night gave you, say “Amen!” and then open your mouth wide and say, “Aaaaaaaahhhhhh-ummmph!”

Just make sure you spread Christmas cheer not STD, okay?