Watch Me Entertain Myself!

Sacha Guitry once said, "You can pretend to be serious, but you can't pretend to be witty." Oh yes, I'm the great pretender.
(pilot episode: 20 January 2004)

Monday, August 11, 2008

At Isa Pang Commercial! (Something To “Wake” You Up)

From the makers of “Hollabaklaan” comes another bentahan moment!

* * * * *

(To be read out loud like the voice-over in one of those home shopping networks on TV)

Tired of attending a wake and seeing them use the college graduation photo of the deceased, when clearly the dearly departed died at the ripe old age of 78?

Don’t you think that the recently deceased, while clearly deserving of a photo wherein she is at her most flattering, should also have a picture that’s closer to her age when she died?

Never fear. R.I.P. is here!

R.I.P. is for Rest In Photo. We tie-up with the leading life insurance companies to give each and every Filipino a chance to look good and true-to-life, even in death. Every year upon payment of your premium, you are entitled to a photoshoot at the R.I.P. Studio. R.I.P. promises that you will be photographed at your most flattering best every year—until you die!

So why wait? Sign up now before it’s too late!

R.I.P. – Eternal pose grant unto you; and let perpetual light flash upon you

* * * * *

As usual, we had a field day thinking up of taglines (or straplines) for R.I.P. The following are the others we thought of (in no particular order):
• An eternal pose for the eternal repose of his soul.
• Your last shot at a good picture.
• It’s shoot to death.
• It’s shoot to kill!
• Death, be not proud (but you will be with your photo!).
• What a killer smile!
• Your digital best at your eternal rest.

And we also thought of spin-off companies. If R.I.P. is high-end like Belo, then the following are for the low-end market, like Ellen’s:

• Porma Linya – Buhay na buhay ang beauty mo.
• Pose Mortem – Put the rigor in your mortis.

Thank you Harry, Dave F., Marrise, Dave A. and Ariel for an uber-bentahan Saturday evening.


Stan™ said...

i wouldn't mind having the service one

hahahah... nice kuya mcvie!

joaqui_miguel said...

This is nice! :) Is it just my twisted mind at work or there is a possible market for this in the future?

I know I want a really nice picture displayed in my wake. Anyone with me on this?

This reminds me of 100, especially the part where Joyce was shopping for her coffin and choosing the dress she would wear. hehehe

enegue said...

joel! i lost my cellphone on the way to school. i'm getting your number again when i have a new one.. hopefully soon

E said...

do they have HIV discounts?

Anonymous said...

Hahaha Joel.

Other taglines:

1) R.I.P. : It's a dying business.

2) R.I.P. : Ang nag-iisang hanap-buhay na ang hanap ay patay.

I hope you are doing ok.